Causes and Solutions: Trying to get a 7 when you could get an 8.

My degree happens to be in sociology with a comparative cultural emphasis. At uni, I studied the cultures of different regions and  countries and learned how their particular development as societies shaped their values and approaches to life.

When I read and analyze students' IELTS essays, I can’t help but notice how culture influences how a person answers questions. As much as the trinity of IDP/BC/Cambridge does what they can to create questions which are answerable by people from all over the world, they don’t always do as good a job as they might. For instance, in one of the official books, there is a question about gap-year students, meaning students who take a year off between high school and starting university to work and travel abroad. When I present this question to my students here in Myanmar, they look at me aghast. Because of the culture, economy and other aspects of growing up in a least-developed country, the idea of young people doing this is completely foreign. They have never heard of such a thing!

I think the role of museums in a society is similarly very culturally subjective and different from place to place. 

Watch the video for details

Well, tonight, we’re going to be looking at an essay from a candidate who happens to come from Nigeria. Most of the people whose IELTS essays I read online, as I am part of the IELTS Tips and Tricks group, most of them are from one region: South Asia. It’s refreshing to read a different voice and a different perspective. This person is very forward and uses common-sense explanations.  

Great name!

The challenges he faces as a writer, on the other hand, were not created by his national identity, but by his level of English. It's too high. He is using a template designed to lift up a Band 6 student to Band 7. They hurt your essay if you're writing Band 8 otherwise!
 
We've seen this before. We’ve seen people who have done a lot of study and research online and learned often very valuable approaches to structuring their responses. But they apply them line by line, paragraph by paragraph without regard to the content of the essay. They use sentences that supposedly fit it any essay - which is not a smart thing to do if you can write your own sentences. Often, they DON'T fit into they essay, and that's when the trouble starts. The overuse and robotic selection of cohesive devices in his essay meant they he was limited in his ability to take a good point and fully extend it.  



In analyzing this video, an entirely different and strange idea came to me...

The Song of Task 2.

_______________
Post note:
The Writer of this essay followed up with another one about a week later... see here.